Kate's CORNER (no k)

Hey guys!
I've decided to write another little sidebar for you all (though I am learning fast that 98% of the blog's readership consists of our blood relatives, and i suspect our mothers check it about every eight minutes. Perhaps the remaining 2% is my Alaskan stalker). I am considering dedicating this edition to Alice, as she kindly provided the vast majority of the material.

So folks, here are some highlights from our (or should I say Alice's) recent adventures...

1) Hell on Wheels
Although Ms. Minor did mention her train sickness, she left out some of the choicey bits. During her delirium/psychosis, Alice did the following:
a) Joyously exclaim "Get Rich or Dit Fryin" many many times. This of course, is the mangled title of the 50 cent album that I once saw in an illegal CD market in Peru. It really struck a chord with Alice. All through the night, I feared "fryin'" would be her final word.
b) Vigorously sing the chorus of "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds". Perhaps, in her seemingly drugged state, she was hoping to avoid substance charges, and figured this song would arouse the least amount of suspicion.
c) Try to make a new friend. Given that she was just emerging from the flailing stage, this elderly gentlemen ran back into the train cabin with nothing but terror in his eyes.

2) Potassium
Several days later, it was Deepa's turn to be ill, and Alice and I were out to dinner. Fruit has been relatively scarce thus far, so we opt for Fruit Night. We each get a banana shake, and eagerly await the two "Seasonal Fruit Platters" we've ordered. It turns out each SFP is a basket containing five bananas. Alone in the restaurant with nine waiters (who are, of course, all staring at us) and 14 bananas (approximately four in the liquid form), we try to make the best of things.

3) The Dinner Buffet
The next night, at the same restaurant where Alice and I got in touch with out inner apes, we branch out to the dinner buffet option. When the bill comes, we're told the shabby buffet will cost us 600 rupees each---ABSURD, as dinner for three at this place costs around 200. Like the scorned women we are, Alice and I fall into a state of buffet-plunder, focused primarily on apples and naan, as Deepa tries very, very hard not to know us. Oh, sweet revenge.

4) Burrs
Driving between Udaipur and Jodhpur, we stop at the side of the road to relieve ourselves. Deepa and I come out unscathed, but somehow Alice emerges from the brush covered in hundreds of small burrs. As our driver begins to help her pick them off, four local teenage boys--many of who have yet to learn the meaning of "inappropriate touch"--help out the effort. Soon, more boys come, and finding no room left around Alice, press their faces to the car and unblinkingly stare at Deepa and I for several minutes. In short, we are a spectacle.

5) Bad Timing
After riding camels in the Rajasthani desert, the three of us disembark by some dunes and a gathering of locals. We walk to the top of the highest dune, at which point Alice decides to fling herself down the slope, with about the amount of caution one would reserve for something unfeeling. Like wood. It goes poorly. Just as Alice stands up to verify her bones remain unbroken two things happen. First, she realizes she has lost her shoe somewhere inside the dune. Second, a massive sandstorm hits. Blinded and caught in a stampede of panicking locals, Alice's right shoe becomes forever part of the landscape.

Well, those are the adventures, large and small, of the past week. It has been wonderful to receive your emails, and unless any of you would like one as a gift, I am continuing to hold off on all offers of whips...
Love, love, love,
Kate